Woke up about 2 this afternoon. Been very down today, cried a few times. Not lifted a finger at doing any housework.
Didnt eat anything till Owen made me a bacon sandwich tonight. Thanks Owen.
Matt wanted me to cook something but I havent got the consentration today to cook toast never mind anything else.
Been drinking lots of coffee, seem to be addicted to it.
Alex has been good, I played in the garden with him today.
Monday, 9 April 2007
Sunday, 8 April 2007
Ups and Downs
I woke up this morning convinced it was Saturday. Only when I ran downstairs and opened the door to my beautiful daughter ,Clare (20) and my gorgeous Grandson Kyle (2), did I realise it was Easter Sunday.
It's 8 days now , it seems to me that the days have just blended together.
I did ,however, remember to take the anti depressant today, and give Owen his.
I managed to go for a walk with my partner Matt (aka Hippy), Clare , kyle and my son Alex (2).
It's taken me 2 attemps at remembering to put the chicken in the oven, but between myself and Clare we managed to cook a lovely roast dinner for 6.
The washing has been out all day, Owen bought it in for me tonight (Good Lad).
Tonight I am quite emotional. I have been receiving beautiful messgaes about Pete. I hope I am as good a person as he is. Thank you so much , the messages bring me so much comfort. I feel on my own here. I wish Pete was nearer to me to visit. Neither Matt nor me drive. I miss my brother so much, we are very close even tho we don't see each other much.
It's 8 days now , it seems to me that the days have just blended together.
I did ,however, remember to take the anti depressant today, and give Owen his.
I managed to go for a walk with my partner Matt (aka Hippy), Clare , kyle and my son Alex (2).
It's taken me 2 attemps at remembering to put the chicken in the oven, but between myself and Clare we managed to cook a lovely roast dinner for 6.
The washing has been out all day, Owen bought it in for me tonight (Good Lad).
Tonight I am quite emotional. I have been receiving beautiful messgaes about Pete. I hope I am as good a person as he is. Thank you so much , the messages bring me so much comfort. I feel on my own here. I wish Pete was nearer to me to visit. Neither Matt nor me drive. I miss my brother so much, we are very close even tho we don't see each other much.
Saturday, 7 April 2007
In limbo
This is the 7th day that my brother Pete has been in a coma with very serious brain injury caused by losing control of his motorbike and hitting a tree.
There is no measure to the worrying I'm going through. There is no comfort for my mind. I can't concentrate , the house is looking a mess, I managed to get some washing pegged out on the line today and put another load into the washing machine, although I've just remembered that the washing is still on the line and it is now 12.00am. No way am I going out there now.
Another thing I just remembered is that I had forgotten to take my anti depressent. God, i'm going to be feeling so low tomorrow now. Not only that , I've also forgotten to get my oldest son , Owen 21, to take his anti depressent. He is asleep in the chair.
My partner Matt deserves a medal putting up with me and my disorder (Avoidant Personality Disorder). The news of my brother has put me into shock and Matt and my children have been a tower of strength.
There is no measure to the worrying I'm going through. There is no comfort for my mind. I can't concentrate , the house is looking a mess, I managed to get some washing pegged out on the line today and put another load into the washing machine, although I've just remembered that the washing is still on the line and it is now 12.00am. No way am I going out there now.
Another thing I just remembered is that I had forgotten to take my anti depressent. God, i'm going to be feeling so low tomorrow now. Not only that , I've also forgotten to get my oldest son , Owen 21, to take his anti depressent. He is asleep in the chair.
My partner Matt deserves a medal putting up with me and my disorder (Avoidant Personality Disorder). The news of my brother has put me into shock and Matt and my children have been a tower of strength.
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